Middle school is a crazy time for every teenager. You begin to discover dating, drama, making friends, losing them, and at the same time your trying to keep your grades on top of all these emotions that are running fast My middle school experience was no exception. I had one experience in particular that has stuck with me that I will never forget.
I was a cheerleader, and my friend on the cheer team was dating a boy that I found very cute. However, knowing that he was my friend’s boyfriend, I was not about to act on my feelings. I told a couple of my closer friends that I would date him if he was single, which ended up being a big mistake. Somehow his girlfriend found out, and instead of talking to me about it, she all of a sudden started treating me like an outcast and making it known she felt I wasn’t good enough to be on the team. We had practice everyday, and she made sure to make those couple of hours as miserable as possible for me. She gave me dirty looks and would say things to me as I walked past like “What are you looking at?” She even posted on MySpace and told all our friends that I was a backstabber, a liar and a terrible friend. This whole time I had done absolutely nothing!! A few of her other close friends caught on and began to treat me the same way. I felt so rejected and hurt. I used to love cheer practice but I felt myself watching the clock and dreading 3:00 pm knowing I was going to be humiliated again. I couldn’t understand why she would be so hateful towards someone she once considered a friend.
A couple months later, I found out I was moving out of state, and I told my friends. She heard about this and pulled me aside one day and gave me a very heartfelt apology. She admitted she was acting immature and she told me she was jealous of me and saw me as a threat. One thing she said really meant a lot to me though.. “I really respect you for ignoring my stupid comments and being so nice to me, even though I was horrible to you.” I could have easily taken part in the drama by saying mean things back to her and picking a fight. Instead, I chose to ignore it and go on with my life by pretending like it didn’t bother me.
If another girl was going through a similar experience, I would tell her to sit down and talk with the girl(s) you are having a conflict with . If you were once friends with her, chances are the problem is something caddy like jealousy or a lack of communication. This isn’t always easy and sometimes this won’t fix the issue. Let face it, girls can be mean and sometimes they really don’t want to fix things, they just want to cause others pain. In that case, I would go to a teacher, counselor, or coach and allow them to handle the situation. Adults have a great way of bringing down the trouble makers without putting you in the middle. In my situation, it was jealousy and a lack of communication. I haven’t seen her in years since I moved to Texas, but I am happy to say that we still talk occasionally and I still consider her a friend. I am so glad that I remained mature and held on to my morals and values throughout the whole situation. If not, I may have lost a friend and made myself appear to be on their immature level. When all else fails, take the high road. You might not win them all, but you know you’ve done your best!!
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